The dad of that boy who earned a bullet to the chest probably wishes he snooped a little harder. Every parent gets to choose how they entend on raising their own child. At 3 I barely trust her to go pee by herself. She has the option of earning a whole lot of trust, however I spoke specifically to not trusting other people with my child.
+1, I'll back you on taking the hard line! I don't have to do it... my wife does the snooping, and it's led us to some very weird places as you can only imagine!