Wife against carrying...help!

[flamatrix99]

As Brannon pointed out with analogies, my wife seemed to really understand the Fire Extinguisher in the house and wearing a seat belt.

You don't wear your seat belt b/c you WANT to get in a wreck,

If you don't do either of these, they can be just as costly.

Shall we really go over the statistics of those who wear their seatbelts vs those who don't? and what happens to those who don't?

I can't convince mine to wear hers. I have given up and whatever happens happens. She has that iit won't happen to me atittude about alot of things.

Now my wife doesn't mind guns!

 

[CloudStrife]

I can't convince mine to wear hers. I have given up and whatever happens happens. She has that iit won't happen to me atittude about alot of things.

Now my wife doesn't mind guns!

I had a gf that I had a hard time getting her to even carry pepper spray. She'd either forget or, if I reminded her, she'd not listen to me because she'd feel like I was treating her like a child. When she did that I flipped. It REALLY pissed me off. If she wanted to just bitch at me for treating her like a child, fine. But thinking nothing bad will ever happen and intentionally choosing not to have some form of defense is just DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB! Some people are so content to just keep their heads in the clouds no matter how hard you try to get it through their thick skull. If a person doesn't care enough about their self to bother with some sort of self-defense, I wonder about the other things they supposedly value.

 

[Ben Segrest]

plus i dont tell her when i carry, why should I?

This vid is kinda long, and she's kinda annoying, but it answers your question.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXbC9cW95Gw"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXbC9cW95Gw[/ame]

 

[flamatrix99]

I had a gf that I had a hard time getting her to even carry pepper spray. She'd either forget or, if I reminded her, she'd not listen to me because she'd feel like I was treating her like a child. When she did that I flipped. It REALLY pissed me off. If she wanted to just bitch at me for treating her like a child, fine. But thinking nothing bad will ever happen and intentionally choosing not to have some form of defense is just DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB! Some people are so content to just keep their heads in the clouds no matter how hard you try to get it through their thick skull. If a person doesn't care enough about their self to bother with some sort of self-defense, I wonder about the other things they supposedly value.

I am one of those people. I have a CHP but only carry when we go down to certain areas in BR. Most of the time I just go around town and feel safe or I am back and forth to work and I can't bring it to work.
I do wear my seat belt most of the time. As the driver, my truck is annoying if I don't. DING DING DING I will forget once in blue moon if I am the passenger.

 

[CloudStrife]

I am one of those people. I have a CHP but only carry when we go down to certain areas in BR. Most of the time I just go around town and feel safe or I am back and forth to work and I can't bring it to work.
I do wear my seat belt most of the time. As the driver, my truck is annoying if I don't. DING DING DING I will forget once in blue moon if I am the passenger.

But I doubt you are a 5'8" pretty girl that can do only 2 push-ups on a good day.
She went jogging with a friend on the particular night that I got really mad.

 

[Nolacopusmc]

I can't convince mine to wear hers. I have given up and whatever happens happens. She has that iit won't happen to me atittude about alot of things.

Now my wife doesn't mind guns!

LOL. My wife will not wear one on a regular basis, though I did convince her to wear one AND have a second near the register when she was working at her parents restaurant for Mardi Gras.

However, my wife is very intelligent, and I have at least gotten her to buy into the fact that a threat can come anywhere at anytime, so other safety measures she is pretty good at.

Locking doors
setting alarms
seat placement in public
basic situational awareness.

I found once I got her to realize that things were getting out of hand (watching the news), she started to UNDERSTAND why i do what I do and why I do not like to go certain places unless I have to.

Getting angry or trying to force it will never work and it will only help to make her resent you and fortify the fact that you are some paranoid crazy gun nut.

She has to come to it in her own time and think it was her idea.

I am also fortunate that my wife has a photographic memory and is OCD, so when we get home, if something is not exactly how she left it, then she is like a good bloodhound alerting on a rabbit.

 

[CloudStrife]

I wasn't angry that she wouldn't carry a gun. I actually didn't want her to since she was still afraid of them and had little practice. Pepper spray was the issue at the time.
It's hard, for me at least, not to get angry and frustrated when someone you care about can't be bothered to worry about their own safety.

 

[gsneff]

just carry it without telling her!

 

[Cat]

just carry it without telling her!

Bad bad bad mistake.

It's much easier, and better in the long run, to tell her to get over it than it is to hide it.

 

[Nolacopusmc]

I wasn't angry that she wouldn't carry a gun. I actually didn't want her to since she was still afraid of them and had little practice. Pepper spray was the issue at the time.
It's hard, for me at least, not to get angry and frustrated when someone you care about can't be bothered to worry about their own safety.

I know. I know. Just trying to learn you something from ma life experience. LOL.

 

[CloudStrife]

I know. I know. Just trying to learn you something from ma life experience. LOL.

Well, she was kind of thick-headed and difficult to communicate with in general, so...

 

[oleheat]

So let me get this straight. She doesn't want you to carry a gun for protection because she believes that it's safer to be unarmed when you are under attack from a criminal or criminals, right?

This might be a boiled down, simplistic view of things, but have you ever simply sat her down and explained to her just how DANGEROUSLY STUPID that way of thinking potentially is?

Perhaps you should have her write out her idea of a proper planned response to several different scenarios.

For instance: From out of nowhere, a group of 4 young hoodlums confront you & your wife, demanding your valuables. You are alone & on your own. One of them has a knife, and some of them are making suggestive threats of what they intend to do to your wife while making you watch them. What should you do?
If that scenario- which you can bet your ass is happening somewhere in this country while you are reading this- doesn't hit home with her, I just don't know what to say. I can say this- I would press the issue.

 

[Witiku]

...
It's hard, for me at least, not to get angry and frustrated when someone you care about can't be bothered to worry about their own safety.

Ditto. But it makes your role all the more important.

In this violent and unforgiving world, let them enjoy their obliviousness and carry on. They will know to trust your judgment when you continually avoid conflict and one day it becomes clear to her because she will see the why part. It may be an epiphany for her.

My wife can't spot a shoplifter for anything, off in her own world when shopping. When in WM or wherever, I often point them out to her and she gets her 5-0 dander up, a certain clued in awareness comes over her. Truely funny to see.

Over christmass I asked her, why would that GPS be in the candy isle, then I took her a stroll by again and she noticed its been moved into a cart then back on a shelf in the cereal isle. The 'shoppers' and the trailing security were discretely ID'd and she was amazed she had missed this little show.

This kind situational awareness and time has caused her to fully stop her anti carry attitude.

When traveling and we pull into a rest stop, etc, and I choose to keep rolling on through, she casually asks something like 'Was it those guys' etc. No more fuss.

 

[Cat]

Okay, now that would be fun for me. I couldn't spot a shoplifter if you whacked me over the head with one.

 

[CloudStrife]

Okay, now that would be fun for me. I couldn't spot a shoplifter if you whacked me over the head with one.

Me neither. I could spot people who look like shoplifters, but having your butt hanging out of your pants doesn't make you one.

 

[Cat]

Me neither. I could spot people who look like shoplifters, but having your butt hanging out of your pants doesn't make you one.

There is a certain hell for those boys for having to make me look at them in public like that.

And I just want to take that cockeyed tilted square thug cap and beat the hair off of their dumbass heads.

 

[CloudStrife]

There is a certain hell for those boys for having to make me look at them in public like that.

And I just want to take that cockeyed tilted square thug cap and beat the hair off of their dumbass heads.

cockeyed tilted square thug cap with the tag still on it. Don't forget the tag. That's the new thing.

 

[XD-GEM]

LOL. My wife will not wear one on a regular basis, though I did convince her to wear one AND have a second near the register when she was working at her parents restaurant for Mardi Gras.

With all of the home invasions going on in Lakeview, maybe she needs to start.

 

[nola]

Tell Kaley to get over it! Having a CHP is totally necessary and having your weapon with you at all times when possible could mean the difference between life or death. She should feel safer with you having one.

Don't just carry it anyway. Teach her why you should carry it. Give her examples of scenarios where you wouldn't want to be without it.

Have a plan. Teach her that the first priority in a potentially deadly situation is to help you as much as possible. By this I mean tell her to take cover or make an escape while dialing 911. Be a silent observer. Be a good witness. Have her tell the 911 operator what is going on, what the bad guy is wearing, how many of them there are, what type of vehicle they are driving, a license plate number, etc. Most importantly have her tell the 911 operator what you are wearing. You do not want responding police officers to arrive and see you with a firearm and mistake you for a bad guy.